Piyali hovered anxiously through the corridors. Her droopy eyes endeavoured to discern the hustle around. She could hear whispers, sense inquietude, and could relate to the disregarded quivering of hearts. She sat down and started biting her nails.
“Stop it now!! Putul,” Soumik pulled her hands away from her face.
“You do not know what is going on within me,” Piyali looked into Soumik’s eyes.
Soumik held her hand firmly and she felt calm.
“I do not know what celestial powers you possess, Motlu,” Piyali playfully pinched Soumik’s cheeks.
Piyali looked at the woman crying inconsolably as she barged out of one of the rooms. She felt a lump in her throat. She had seen something similar a few days before, and with every visit, she understood that this place was a pristine depiction of dazzling dawn for the fortunate ones. But for some, it ended up being a shadowy portraiture of abandoned desires of dusk.
“There she goes counting sheep in her dreams,” Soumik laughed.
“Will you ever get serious? They might hear you,” Piyali hushed Soumik.
“I don’t think so but you look trapped in a lion’s den,” Soumik giggled.
Lion’s den! Piyali smiled to herself. She remembered the days, when she fell prey to the deadly wolf and the futuristic trap that awaited to cage her forever. The scars were so deep that it took years for her to heal, to accept and to move on. She could still feel the unheard cries of her unborn child. The sharp edge of the leather belt peeled her skin off. The dark memories of yore tore the helpless soul from the core.
“You are free now and the monster is gone, Putul,” Soumik held her hands tightly.
“I know, Motlu! It’s just sometimes when I look at what I have lost, in the name of love; my time, my career, my child, my emotions and you, how could I leave behind everything behind for someone like him?” Piyali looked at Soumik and felt choked.
“Putul, my baby!! You have become a successful writer, the bad times are over. I am always there for you and the best part is that the future that you postponed is going to transpire soon.” Piyali smiled amidst the tears.
After her divorce, it took years for her to accept, manifest and discover her capabilities. The clouds of self-doubt and depression covered the sky of her vision but her knight in shining armour, Soumik Chatterjee stood by her. Her self-discovery was the outcome of Soumik’s manifestation and confidence in her future.
“God is with you!” It was Soumik who encouraged Piyali to visit the clinic recommended by Sweta.
“Are you sure, Piyali? You are going to put a lot of money into this and there is no looking back,” Sweta warned her again.
“I Know, Sweta. But I feel the universe has manifested this for me,” Piyali said confidently.
Dr Neha Mittal explained the whole process and the emotional breakdown attached with it, which may affect her future.
“See Piyali you have a very low egg count. We will try our best to help you. But you are going to be a single mother. There will be collapsing meltdowns at many points, but yes freezing your eggs for the future is a great decision,” Dr Neha Mittal’s words comforted Piyali.
Piyali had seen other patients, some looked down on themselves with shame as if they were committing a crime, while some eyes used to well up with remorse and emptiness that carried the stigma of being worthless and doomed, and then anxiety and fear cage you in the web of expectations. But then there was hope- to embrace motherhood and to feel the knock of those tiny hands and feet on the doors of the uterine walls.
“Piyali, please don’t mind but why do you want to freeze the eggs? There are other options too,” Sweta asked Piyali.
“I Know, Sweta! And maybe in future I would go for that too but my body wants to feel motherhood for once. I haven’t seen Ma but through Baba’s words, I have felt her love, those nine months, for once I wish to feel that,” Piyali smiled.
After two weeks of eager anticipation and thrusting hormonal injections, Piyali chose March 8th, Women’s day for the egg retrieval procedure. Piyali concealed her anxiety with exceptional conviction.
“MISS PIYALI CHATTERJEE!!”
As they walked, she remembered walking down the aisle holding his hands.
Soumik whispered, “Putul, do you remember the day, when you were about to get married, what did I say?”
“Putul, Baba is just one call away… Whenever you feel things are not okay, come back home!!” Piyali remembered the words.
Soumik, her father stood by her through the divorce procedure, he encouraged her to fight. He motivated her to freeze her eggs and become a mother, “the future” she carried in her eyes like a dream but postponed due to the unfavourable circumstances.
She reached the room and she turned back.. She could feel Baba’s form disappearing and the lines echoing, “Baba is always there for you, just a call away!”
Baba left two years ago but his presence was felt through his reminiscences and through the essence of the future that Piyali once postponed but now will cherish soon…
892 words excluding title..
Putul- Piyali’s nickname
Image from Pexels(pixabay)
